I don’t know about you, but I often feel like there is so much swirling around in my head that it’s really tricky to get clear on exactly what it is that I want. I also find this to be true when working with many of my clients. One of the biggest challenges that I face in my work with a client is getting clear on what it is she wants, and helping her pinpoint that desire. Sometimes, she doesn’t even know! This is an important step because quite frankly, it is the key to the entire transformation process. If there is not a strong, clear foundation, all that is built will crumble with time. For instance, knowing that you want to lose 10 pounds or feel less stressed is not enough. It’s too ambiguous and it’s not connected to the core.
I was on a call this afternoon and was using the transformational coaching method skills that I have been trained in. I was reminded yet again that the “thing” that we initiate when we want to seize a goal, what we “start with” per se, is so often not the root of where we need to go or where we want to be. But, the thing is, the root is the key. If we are always focusing on the symptoms and the superficial stuff, we will never get to the root. The root is what keeps us firmly planted exactly where we are. The root has to be pulled out from under us in order to achieve the change. Otherwise, different versions of the same struggle will keep cropping up.
So, how do you get to the root? The first step is taking some time to consider what is that you do and don’t want. At first glance, this might seem simple. But, you might be surprised at the complexity of this question and the rabbit hole you will step into once you start to really consider this question. Do you have something in mind that you want to achieve? I encourage you to spend some time to take your next best step and complete the activity below. Then schedule a Breakthrough Strategy Session with me to take this to the next level and get really clear on what is that you want and what you have to do to get there.
Draw a line down the middle of a sheet of paper. At the top of one column, write “do want,” and on the top of the other column write, “don’t want.” Set a timer for three minutes. Decide with which column you would like to start. Then start your timer and freely write as much as you can possibly think of. Repeat for the second column. How did it feel to complete this activity? What conflicts, insights, or surprises did you notice? Are your wants and don’t wants in line with how you are currently living? Have this information handy when you call me, and get ready to unearth those roots!
Chat soon!
Emily